Cain's Social Security Number

Most of you know that Cain, my preemie son, born in August of 2008, was born in Holland.
In Holland they handle paperwork surrounding births very different than they do in The U.S.
For starters, a parent, or someone else who was present at the birth, has to go to the Vitals office and report the birth within 3 days of the baby's arrival. They ask for the names of the parent(s) and baby, what day and time, and which hospital the baby was born in, whereas in America, the hospital's social workers (I assume) take care of all of this.
Thankfully I had my mom and sister there. My mom and her boyfriend (/husband) reported Cain's birth while I was recovering in my hospital bed. Cain was, however, automatically added to my insurance when the Vitals office contacted them with his "social security" number. That was great! "Yay, one less thing that I need to worry about!"

Chris came to visit us, and meet his son, about 4 months after Cain was born. We had so much to talk about, plan, share, take care of and catch up on. Chris was in awe of his newborn mini-me and Cain was visibly LOVING his daddy.
So much so, that we basically stayed in the house the entire time Chris was there. Everything that we were supposed to do was no longer a priority; these 2 needed a chance to get to know each other and just cuddle as much as they could. I was so happy to see him again after 8 months, and my heart just melted when I saw him with Cain. I decided I wanted to go back to him as soon as Cain was big/healthy enough to travel.
We only had a week and a half together, and they pretty much spent the entire time in "each others" arms.
Cain and I were both so sad when daddy had to leave. At least we would get to see him again in 2-3 months..

Cain and I sneaked into the country the easiest and least expensive way. Me using my American passport, on a ticket with a return flight. "What's your reason for travel?" "We're vacationing. We're here to see daddy!" "Oh, your son is adorable!!"

Then it started.. We tried to get insurance for us all.. Cain doesn't yet have a social security number, so insurance is out of the question for now. OK, well let's get him his social security card.
The person on the other side of the desk at the Social Security Office tells me I need his birth certificate. "I don't have the original, but this is the abbreviated version." Not good enough, and if we use his passport instead, he will be an alien. On top of that, we need a certificate of birth abroad.
Apparently, when we skipped our to do list when Chris was in Holland, we messed everything up for all of us. We were supposed to go to the US embassy/consulate to notify them of Cains birth. We figured we could just do that when we got to Ohio but.. not so much.
Basically, we need to go back to Holland, which costs about $1200 per adult ticket, 10% of an adult ticket plus taxes for the babies (yes, 2 by now) for the flight, then go to the U.S. consulate and pay $500 to report his birth (which was 2 years ago) so that we can go to the Social Security Office a few miles from our apartment and stand in line for another hour to file for his FREE social security number.

We were planning to go to Holland this summer, mainly to take care of all of Cain's things, but also because of the World Cup (soccer). Chris wanted to go to South Africa to watch the games live, but since that didn't work out, Holland would be a good alternative. They go crazy for soccer, and I'd love to share some of my culture with my boyfriend, after being together for so many years, and only have visited for 1.5 weeks which we spent in the house..
It's not looking so good though.. We are still hoping to go, but in reality it seems pretty impossible. :(
I'm almost positive though, that there has to be another way. They can't force us to spend thousands of dollars to go back to the country of birth, can they?!! I wish there was a way to just ASK SOMEONE what we should. Unfortunately, to-the-point-answers are hard to come by these days, especially when all these phone lines are automated! :/